Why did we moved so much when when the kids were kids?  Rent Increases!

Well, at first it wasn’t all about the rent increases.  At first it was about taking advantage of the opportunity for a larger apartment at a not such expensive monthly rate.

Our first place, after the second divorce, was a little one-bedroom in a courtyard style apartment complex.  I’ve fond memories of that apartment.  I loved the courtyard venue, the fact that it had a front and rear door and you could cut through the bathroom “hallway” to get from the kitchen to the bedroom – it was open.  My two younger children shared the bedroom, I slept on a futon in the living area.  The apartment had these great glass door cabinets in the “dining area”, which essentially was a large room where you would place your table on one side and your couch on the other.  After a few years of living there, a two bedroom opened up in the complex of one of our elementary school friends.  It was affordable, I was in college working on my bachelors and financial aid was helping me afford the move.  Here is the B-Side…

Next door to this lived a handsome young prince…not really.  But, there lived a single father, who was also a parent at our elementary school.  After a few months of living there, we got closer and at the end of my lease he asked to move in to his place.  So, I did.  Turned out he was a little more Prima Donna than I had initially identified and this did not go well.  So, within a short period of moving there, we were moving out.  My framework for living and moving was simple (so I thought):  1) always to keep my children in the same school; 2) work near where we lived; 3) moving had to happen when the kids were with dad for the summer – they were already having to deal with a new space, they didn’t also need to deal with “packing, moving, and unpacking”.  They too were unhappy with the living situation, as the little boy had some very interesting behaviours, which no one understood.  The balancing act was magical, and timely of course.

Degree in hand, I started looking for an apartment and a permanent job.  Lo and behold, I quickly found both.  Life was never easy, but things always worked out – don’t tell me the stars do no align.  They do. Mostly.

The apartment I found was another one bedroom, but I didn’t care!  It was ours, it was in another amazing little apartment complex, and it had a back patio and a pool.  The other thing it had was lots and lots of trees.  Turns out, trees to which both my son and I were allergic!  It was the worse allergy and asthma experience of our life.  We both ended up in the hospital on multiple occasions thanks to these outbreaks of attacks.  It wasn’t until this point however, that we realized that we were allergic to grass, elm, cat and dog dander, and god knows what else.  So, now what?  We now have to move, again!  Ugh!

What to do? What to do?  Well, while all this played out, there was a gang of other stuff going on.  I had become “pen pals” with a friend that had moved to another state.  The more we penned, the closer we got.  The closer we got, the more he realized that he was not happy in his relationship.  So what’s our solution? Come back to California and let’s see if this works out.  I can’t recall if the decision to move was a result of the coming together or the coming together was a result of my need to move.  In any case, move we did.  That was after cutting off my entire (tiny) family off for either continued verbal abuse, the use of drugs and alcohol in my home or the attempted humiliation of my son by my father.  Moving seemed to solve a lot of problems.  We got out of this highly allergic environment, moved into a larger space with plenty of rooms for everyone, new addresses and phone numbers for all, and the start of what promised to be a stable relationship.

Hiccup…

That didn’t work out.  Mr. clean and sober good guy picked up a drinking habit.  What the fuck!  Do I attract men that are prone to drinking?  Or do I make them drink?  Hah!

Now the rent kicks in.  Awesome little house.  Monthly rent increases as soon as the lease expired.  Move we shall.  Remember, kids in same school, move during summer break.  Voila! Another alignment of the stars.

I wont burden you with any of the “stuff” that went on here…son stopped talking to father, daughter thought she was old enough to move away (the first time), etc., etc., etc.

Lovely apartment, from which we ended up having to move, yet again, due to rent increases.  But this time the criteria was slightly different.  My son was miserable in school and we were looking for a better option.  So, staying in the same neighborhood could be taken off the table.  A friend owned a house and had a couple of rooms to rent out.  Again, star alignment.

This brings us to son going off to college, daughter moving away, again, and it now being just me.  In order to try to help my son gain some independence, I move and my friend rents him a room (that’s another blog).

That about covers why we moved so much.

The mind reels from all the recall and all the other dirty little messes that come to mind.

Until next time…