Dec_27_04

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12/27/04

Babies

I can not believe so much time has passed since I wrote in this book for you.

We are in a new place now, on the hill – 75 Monterey Rd. The place is very nice, a “find” really – and we’ve been here since August of this year.

Emma, we’ve done few of the things I wished we would do – and I can not justify why.  You started Karate in October and it has gone well.

You both started at Renaissance and while neither of you are certain it is what you like, I feel deep in my heart that it is a good thing for you.  You are being exposed to things that you otherwise would not see unless through me or much later in life.

I pray everyday for guidance.  How I hope I am not failing you too poorly as a mother or in preparing you for life.

I know there is always more that can be done.  And I need to find the strength to do it.  I don’t want to see you suffer or struggle the way I have.  I do not want to see you not progressing or growing, flourishing, taking advantage of life.  I realize that much of what you will become depends on how I lead you.  But remember this: What I have become depended on how you lead me.

We have had a good year.

Emma, you ebb and flow, try to find your stream.

Brandon, you ebb more than you flow – what drives you? Find it! and press on the accelerator.

Both of you need to find the pleasure and the mystery of life and put it to good use.

I’ll try to be a better example, but don’t always expect me to lead.

I can not get enough of you. Love Momma